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Belmore Church of Christ

You can bin the fairy lights and mood-matching tealights. Londoners know the true glow gods are flashing attitude panels. Big, bold, and louder than a rowdy night bus, neon is back, and it’s got attitude. From what’s left of Soho’s neon jungle to Shoreditch’s curated chaos, neon signs are London’s passive-aggressive wallpaper. They wink, shine seductively, and sometimes go full meltdown—but that’s exactly the point. Come on: this city’s perma-moody.

It spits aggressively. Half the buildings look like they were drawn in a rush. So when a in-your-face pink sign says "You Look Hot in That" from inside a café you weren’t cool enough to know existed, it hits different. It’s vibes. And no, it’s not just for your Story highlight called "Vibes". Neon in London has proper roots, mate. Walthamstow’s neon temple? An eyeball massage. If you haven’t been—go.

Bring a backup pair of eyeballs. And maybe a friend to keep you grounded, just in case. Neon is the great equaliser. Pubs, vape lounges, even off-licenses are getting in on the action. Pop up a glowing "You’re Home-ish" and suddenly your flat viewing feels like a music video with mould. And the phrases—oh the neon nonsense. "Treat Yo Self." It’s like being yelled at by a sassy toaster. Yeah, a bit. But also weirdly inspiring.

Neon signs in London aren’t just decoration. They’re part existential meltdown, part fashion statement, and fully proof we’ve all lost the plot a bit. They say: "Yes, the rent’s a joke, the bins are overflowing, and the air smells of vape and regret—but look at this glowing pink banana. Now go vibe." So next time one catches your eye—probably in a pub loo whispering "Don’t Poo with Sadness" as you reevaluate your last five decisions—just take the compliment.

The sign believes in you. Even if it’s buzzing like a wasp.

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